Our Pain Our Gain
by Keys Studio
Summary: Cheshire knew Xerxes since he was eleven. He knew him both as Kevin Legnard and as Xerxes Break. He told him, when he was twelve, that he would marry him. Kevin gave him ten objectives to meet. Can he meet them all while still loving the man? Especially since Kevin became Xerxes? Read and find out! Blood, torment, yaoi, Xerxshire! Happy new years, guys.


**Woot! My first fanfic of the year of 2014! :D**

**I do not own Pandora Hearts, Jun Mochizuki-sama does. :3**

**[xXx]**

Cheshire Cat had always been different from all of the children in the Abyss Orphanage. He had always been different, ever since that cold, snowing night that Madeline, the matron, had found him asleep with a large bell, golden and beautiful, in his small, frail hands, a reddish pink blanket engulfing his tiny body, and a toy, plush and white, rabbit in a dress beside his head, as if it had been watching over him, to the present, that Madeline once again found him asleep, this time by the fireplace, holding that same toy rabbit in his lap, his head nodding off, slightly disturbing the old, gold bell that was tied around his neck with a fading pink ribbon.

It was last day of the cold November before the beginning of a bleak December, the fallen autumn leaves crisp and blotting the ground outside in a colorful array of reds, oranges, and yellows. The young boy, now nearly a young man (if one counted thirteen years old as a time for being called a young man), sat with his legs crossed in front of him, asleep and clutching his worn out, stitched up, old toy rabbit in his lap, a not a single sound coming from him save for maybe a single 'Nya' or a quiet meow. His large, fluffy cat ears that resided on top of his head twitched from time to time, reacting to almost every little sound. His tail was curled around himself, the white tip flicking as he dreamed soundlessly about who knows what. His slender fingers curled into his toy, his pointed nails threatening to puncture the fabric before they uncurled.

The fire that he sat in front of crackled warmly in the fireplace, keeping the young male in a state of slumber. He was different from everyone in his behavioral patterns at the Abyss Orphanage, from what the matron could gather. He never once complained about nightmares, no matter how much they seemed to plague him in recent years whereas the other children would always come running, begging to sleep with the older children or the matron herself. No, instead, Cheshire seemed to wrap himself up in his own cold blanket of paranoia. He never cried when he got hurt, at least not since an incident with a certain boy back in the second semester of his fourth grade year. All of the other children would cry and bawl and scream until the pain went away. Not Cheshire. He merely stood back up from the wound and learned to treat himself. He didn't ask for anything from anyone. No, he worked for it for himself, by himself. If he wanted something, he would learn how to obtain it. For example, one day he wanted food in the middle of the night. He didn't hesitate to teach himself how to cook and always ate what he made, no matter if it was burnt or not all that tasty.

Cheshire Cat learned how to be a grown up before he was even twelve, taking care of the younger children of the orphanage as if they were his own. He cleaned their rooms, bathed them, took care of them when they were sick, and fed them. He even took odd jobs from people around the neighborhood in order to make money to get the other children some toys and other things (mainly cans of tuna for himself and his own carton of milk to drink). Madeline thought of Cheshire as her little grown up boy, having raised him as her own. His maturity made her more than proud.

Cheshire slept calmly in front of the fire, taking what he believed to be a more than well deserved cat nap, his body slouching forward slightly. He was the second oldest out of all the ophans at the orphanage. It wasn't because he didn't want to be adopted. He did! It was just that nobody wanted a child who had only one eye and already knew how to take care of himself. They wanted a normalish child who was still childlike. He just didn't fit the bill. Of course, any disappointment from the turn downs of not being wanted was replaced with happiness when the matron told him every single time that she considered him her son anyways. She made him happy again.

It had been an hour since the male had fallen asleep. He didn't even know that there were people sitting in the chairs behind him, talking quietly to each other, one knitting a long black scarf, the other fiddling with the bandages that covered the left side of his face. The woman scolded him for doing so to which the man responded that they needed to be changed anyways. Their conversation got louder and louder until it woke the young male, a disgruntled groan coming from his throat as he woke. His eyes fluttered open, one crimson, the other hollow and thus, it was a black abyss. He glanced behind him and then crawled over, laying his head on the man's lap, his cheek pressed against his thigh, effectively shutting him up.

Apparently, they hadn't noticed that he had woken up.

"Ah, Cheshire," sighed the man, laying his hand on the younger's brown hair, beginning to pet him. That enticed a purr from the male.

"He's attached to you, Kevin," chuckled the woman.

"I've noticed, Madeline," the man sighed softly, shaking his head. Normally, he hated to be touched after what had happened the year before, but he allowed the catlike boy to do as he pleased, knowing that he meant no harm. "I just don't get why."

"Well, he just likes you," giggled Madeline, going back to her knitting. "He was the one who helped you when that Shelly girl dragged you here, all bloody and weak, begging us to help you~."

"Tch, don't remind me. That's a memory I would rather not focus on."

"Kev...in..." murmured Cheshire, moving his head so that it was his chin on the man's thigh.

"What is, Cheshire?" Kevin asked, glancing down to the younger.

The brunette reached up and touched the bandages with his pointed finger nails gently. He looked so bored. "Your bandages are dirty." He then stood, holding the paw of his toy in his hand. He then grabbed Kevin's hand gingerly with his other. He used his surprising strength to pull Kevin from his seat, nodding at the matron who just smiled. He then dragged the man to his room, sitting him on his bed.

"You could have changed them in there, you know," frowned Kevin. He squeezed the boy's hand in appreciation, though.

Cheshire gave a small nod before pulling away, running off to the bathroom to grab the firstaid kit. When he came back, he set to work on removing the current bandages, pausing whenever the older cringed. Eventually, the bandages were gone, revealing the blood crusted eye socket. The boy frowned softly at that, reaching up to touch his own hollowed socket. He couldn't help but wonder if that was how his own hole looked after the fourth grade accident.

"Does it look bad?" Kevin asked, reaching up to touch it. He was shocked when the boy's hand caught his own, forcing it back down roughly to the bed. He frowned. "Cheshire...?"

"Don't touch it..." the boy told him. "You keep breaking the skin around it and not letting it heal..." He stood. He went back to the bathroom for a moment to get a wet washcloth. When he came back, the whitette on his bed was scratching feverishly at the left side of his face. "Kevin!"

The whitette jumped in surprise, pulling his hands away from his face. He had been caught.

Cheshire came over and took Kevin's hands. Instead of scolding him, which would have been a funny thing for him to do seeing as to how he was twelve and Kevin was almost twenty, he just used the wet washcloth to clean off his bloodied fingers then his face, holding the cloth in some areas to stunt the bleeding. Soon, the blood, both new and old, was gone. The boy then began to dab a disinfectant covered cotton ball on his wounds.

"I'm sorry."

Cheshire said nothing, beginning to apply the clean, fresh bandages to his face. When he was finished, he laid his head back on the whitette's lap. He didn't look at him, his eyes falling closed. "Don't be..." he told him finally in a small murmur. Then, with the sliver of childish innocence that he still possessed, he continued on with, "I need to be able to take care of my future wife..."

Kevin's face flared up, as did his voice. Several octives, in fact. "W-w-w-w-wife?!"

Cheshire opened his eyes and moved his head so that he could look at the baffled man. "Yeah, wife. Mama said that one day, I will get to marry you and that you'll be my wife."

Kevin had to put two and two together before he began to yell across the orphanage. "MADELIIIIINE! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TEACHING THIS KID?!"

Madeline giggled from her seat in front of the fireplace, choosing not to answer.

Kevin sighed deeply, shaking his head. When he glanced down to look at Cheshire, he noticed the confused look on his face. He then shook his head, frowning. "Cheshire..." he started. He then drew up a blank. How could one tell a twelve year old that they weren't going to get married? It was a strange thing to break to someone so young... "Look... um..." That eye. That innocent eye... It was looking at him questioningly, so curiously. It was like the boy was staring into his soul. He had to look away. He gave up on trying to tell him that they wouldn't get married. He, instead, told him, "If you can do ten things before you are twenty-two, then I will marry you..."

Cheshire's ears perked at that, his eye widening. His tail swished slightly. "Really?" he asked.

Kevin nodded. "Yes. One," he held up one finger, "get adopted. Try hard to get adopted, too. Two," he held up a second finger, "read one hundred books. Fifty have to be nonfiction, the other fifty fiction. Three," a third finger, "be the valedictorian of your class when you graduate high school. Four," a fourth finger, "date some girls so you know what to do in a relationship. You don't have to kiss them, just date them. Five, get a job and start saving your money for your future. Six, learn how to play an instrument. Any instrument, so long as you can play it. Seven, write your vows, if you really want to marry me. Eight, get a ring to propose with and a ring to put on my finger at the wedding. Nine, buy a house or an apartment for us to live in. And ten, get accepted into a college."

Cheshire took note of all of those things and gave a small smile. He nodded. "I'll do it all, Kevin. You have my word!"

Kevin felt that the boy's smile was contagious, chuckling softly. Half of those things would be impossible for the boy to achieve before he was twenty-two. "Alright," he mused. He watched as the cat put away the firstaid kit, falling back on the bed while he was gone. He closed his eyes and yawned. "Cheshire, you really are a strange boy..."

**[xXx]**

**Bah, I make for a bad Kevin, but eff it. XD I just wanted to set up Xerxes's and Cheshire's relationship~.**

**Read and review please~. :D**

**~Grimmolina**


End file.
